{"title":"Corporate Wellness Survivor","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"UTF-8\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCongratulations. You made it through the mandatory all-hands about culture. The pulse survey that was definitely anonymous (it wasn't). The offsite with the icebreaker that required you to share something vulnerable with people you've never met and will see in the elevator tomorrow. The wellness stipend that covered exactly one app and one month of journaling prompts before you went back to stress-scrolling in the bathroom.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou have survived the synergy. The \"let's circle back.\" The \"we're a family here\" from a company that laid off forty people over email. The performance review that described you as \"meeting expectations\" in a tone that made it feel like an insult. You have attended the mindfulness seminar and then gone directly to your desk to send seventeen anxious emails.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis is your merit badge. This is the collection for people who have earned their burnout the hard way — through professionalism, through showing up, through doing the job and someone else's job and the emotional labor of pretending everything was fine in the process.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWear it to your next one-on-one. Bring the candle to your home office. Let the tote carry your lunch back from the kitchen you walk to when you need to feel like a person for four minutes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou survived. That's not nothing.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"corporate-wellness-survivor-tee-cortisol-shirt-burnout-shirt","title":"Corporate Wellness Survivor Tee | cortisol shirt, burnout shirt","description":"Minimalist text tee for the burnout-aware: clean, serif-centered typography reads as a wry take on workplace wellness culture. The restrained black-on-white layout leans into stress-meme and wellness-satire vocab — a subtle, ironic badge for students and young professionals who joke about overwork. 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Clean, centered typography in a muted tone creates a dry, self-aware vibe that fits the cortisol\/stress meme trend—wearable irony for students and young professionals who use humor to cope with overwork. Subtle embroidery and pared-back color keep the shirt understated and easy to style for everyday casual wear or late-night study sessions.\n\nProduct features\n- Embroidery decoration available on left chest, center chest, large center chest, and right + left wrists\n- Made in Nicaragua\n- Adults only\n- Gildan 18000: 8.0 oz\/yd² (271 g\/m²) 50\/50 cotton-polyester blend, classic fit with crew neckline\n- DTF inner neck labels and wrist prints; DTG used for other prints\n\nCare instructions\n- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\n- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\n- Tumble dry: low heat\n- Do not dryclean\n- \n","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":55326940528808,"sku":"92075882038030352734","price":40.72,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ S","offer_id":55326940561576,"sku":"15897312914971916418","price":39.6,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ S","offer_id":55326940594344,"sku":"19184007092838559681","price":40.24,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":55326940627112,"sku":"23322886208231231512","price":39.29,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":55326940659880,"sku":"23155715257075772926","price":40.48,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":55326940692648,"sku":"11038152248768523846","price":39.88,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ M","offer_id":55326940725416,"sku":"30544330979756773367","price":40.44,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ M","offer_id":55326940758184,"sku":"17551739249812989866","price":40.19,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":55326940790952,"sku":"16879483938890732459","price":40.28,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":55326940823720,"sku":"10618010902614389209","price":39.58,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":55326940856488,"sku":"29257133316562702694","price":39.58,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ L","offer_id":55326940889256,"sku":"27570013438593445403","price":40.13,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ L","offer_id":55326940922024,"sku":"55056570036955234452","price":40.45,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":55326940954792,"sku":"33526411933644662660","price":40.16,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":55326940987560,"sku":"58012320398891177623","price":39.34,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":55326941020328,"sku":"27194471102071642775","price":39.32,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ XL","offer_id":55326941053096,"sku":"37849033885153131530","price":39.34,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ XL","offer_id":55326941085864,"sku":"10958707641406807276","price":40.55,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":55326941118632,"sku":"25040204800432511882","price":40.55,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":55326941151400,"sku":"19570633463241432748","price":40.51,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":55326941184168,"sku":"19255661151584593580","price":45.51,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 2XL","offer_id":55326941216936,"sku":"26579804213737257348","price":45.77,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":55326941249704,"sku":"96712772215162148686","price":46.03,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":55326941282472,"sku":"16693050440603540431","price":45.04,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":55326941315240,"sku":"13443662694309026678","price":46.66,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 3XL","offer_id":55326941348008,"sku":"34944590824848721575","price":49.59,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":55326941380776,"sku":"92362975236953027913","price":48.92,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":55326941413544,"sku":"29876909340218398317","price":48.62,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":55326941446312,"sku":"17793332064923954692","price":54.74,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0706\/0547\/1912\/files\/10980392197877022801_2048.jpg?v=1773372466"},{"product_id":"corporate-wellness-survivor-hoodie-cortisol-shirt-burnout-shirt","title":"Corporate Wellness Survivor Hoodie | cortisol shirt, burnout shirt","description":"A minimalist, text-first hoodie that leans into burnout humor with a small, self-aware line centered on the chest. Clean typography and a pared-back white canvas make the design read like a stress-meme statement — sardonic, relatable, and easy to wear while studying, commuting, or lounging between deadlines. The understated aesthetic fits the cortisol\/stress meme trend with short, punchy copy and wearable everyday styling.\n\nProduct features\n- 50% cotton, 50% polyester medium-heavy fabric (8.0 oz\/yd²)\n- Without side seams (tubular knit) for reduced waste and cleaner look\n- Drawstring hood with color-matched drawcord and double-lined hood\n- Kangaroo pouch pocket for hand warmth\n- DTF sleeve and wrist prints; DTG used for main prints; embroidery available on chest or wrists\n\nCare instructions\n- Tumble dry: medium\n- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\n- Do not dryclean\n- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\n- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\n","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":55326941970600,"sku":"23826439209789227067","price":47.35,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":55326942003368,"sku":"74405069488348016299","price":48.36,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ 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